Living Next Door to Hell:

Marriage to a non-Christian brings pain to the believing wife. Living next door to hell is how one Christian counselor described being married to a non-believer.

As women, we long to be known and loved for all we are. A man who is spiritually dead can never know the very intimate spiritual part of you that is your heart. He would be blind to much of what you would want to share with him. He could never know and understand you fully.

Be careful when you begin to think that you are “in love” and you “just can’t live without him.” Think again. Think of the loneliness you will feel when your husband will not attend church with you. Think of the angry bickering that may take place between the two of because he can never understand the depths of your spiritual awareness and consequently, your convictions. If you do not think about this now, you may one day think, “Before, I couldn’t live without him; now I can hardly live with him” 2 Corinthians 6:14-15 is very clear:

Do not be bound together with unbelievers, for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Oh what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer in common with an unbeliever?

Please consider a greater consequence than being unhappily married to a man who does not know your Lord. Will you be able to handle the pain of watching your children live with possible rejection by their father, day in and day out? Will you think it is worth the cost when you are the only one who gets up on Sunday mornings to take your dear children to church?

Will it be worth the compromise when your children look up at you and ask why daddy doesn’t love Jesus? They could even reject the Lord for eternity and live a miserable, ill-chosen lifestyle because of the choice you made to marry a wonderful, but lost man. Children will often follow their father’s example, good or bad. Exodus 34:7 gives a warning you cannot ignore: “…He will by no means leave the guilty unpunished, visiting the iniquity of fathers on the children and on the grandchildren to the third and forth generations.” You are not just marrying a husband, but choosing a father for your children.

When you marry, you do not choose blessings or curses for you alone; you choose for the generations after you. If you choose to wait patiently for your knight in shining armor, you will be blessed by the heritage that a prince brings. If you choose to run eagerly ahead of God’s plan and marry a man with no conscience toward God, you will reap the life’s course he follows, but not alone. Your children’s lives and grandchildren’s lives will be directly affected by the man you marry.

Consider the following scriptures:

All these blessings come upon you and overtake you if you will obey the Lord you God (Deuteronomy 28:2)

But it shall come about, if you do not obey the Lord you God… all these curses shall come upon you and overtake you (Deuteronomy 28:15)

God warned His people in Deuteronomy of the long-term effects of their choices. Today other countries may not take our children, but there are many bondages in our wicked generation that could hold them.

Your sons and your daughters shall be given to another people, while you eyes look on and yearn for them continually; but there will be nothing you can do (Deuteronomy 28:32)

Have you seen the yearning eyes of a mother as she sees her son on drugs or her daughter living on the streets? There is nothing she can do but look on in pain.

These verses in Deuteronomy show that God has always desired to bless His people, but He will not force them to do what is best. In His Word He has often warned us to wait, to be careful, and to trust Him. He will not make us wait. His heart of love begs us to listen and obey so He may bless us and the dear ones who will one day look to and follow us. The words He gave to the children of Israel in Deuteronomy 30:15-20 shows the love and concern He has for the choices you make.

So choose life in order that you may live, you and your descendants, by loving the Lord your God, by obeying His voice, and by holding fast to Him… (Deuteronomy 30:19-20)

You must choose to wait patiently for God’s best. If you have seen patterns in your life that show a lack of patience, commit yourself right now to waiting for God’s best.

You may pray something like this:

Lord,

You are my sovereign God. You know all about me and love me more than anyone else ever could. You know how I feel, what I need, and what my future is. I confess that I have taken matters into my own hands. I confess to being afraid of totally trusting You. Today I commit myself to focus on You and Your love for me. Today I commit to look to You for my future, not my outward circumstances. Thank you for knowing how weak I feel, but being strong for me and in me. I love You. I choose to trust You.

In Jesus’ name.

Amen

I am praying for you and God is crazy about you.